miles

i should be able to see my breath. my hands say so at least. the expression “you could hang meat in here.” comes to mind, and it isnt funny. you could. 

i walked into a bathroom at some random truck stop on some highway somewhere one time. it was like walking into my apartment right now. a sudden twenty degree drop from normal indoor temperatures. again, the expression of hanging meat came to mind. as i stood in my urinal slot shocked at how quick my hands got cold i decided suggesting to a truck driver that he should hang meat in the bathroom might be taken the wrong way. i decided to keep shut about the temperature. as i zipped up a senior citizen walked in and was instantly mad that you could hang meat in the damn bathroom. he said so out loud. as i walked away from the pisser i looked at him and said, “just was, you can!”

i really only think of making a trip to the store to buy ice cream when it is cold outside. im not putting on my hat and heading out today though. its could out, so i want ice cream, but its cold in too. i wouldnt want to touch it.

a day of halves

cavemom is hiking with us. thats emory’s mother, catherine. caveman, cavemom. it was an obvious name. such a sweetheart, but absolutely getting it handed to her. its not fair for her. here we are at the peak of our fitness in the easiest state we have walked across. totally legging it, and her, totally green.  she manages make it to camp every night and smile and laugh at the gay jokes.

today we took a good long break at the half way point. well, maybe not the true half way, but at least where the sign was. a pretty big deal. the rest is the way home. walking till the paint on the trees runs out. on both sides of us 1,082 miles of trail. a mile down the road we came across another half.

a half gallon of ice cream with my name on it. caveman, slimfast, and i all attempted and succeeded in eating our very own half gallon of ice cream. it took me 2 minutes under an hour to drain my 14 servings of fudge ripple. my head went swimmy and opening my mouth was nearly vomit inducing, but i made it. and all i got was a lousy wooden “spoon” . more like a miniature tongue depressor. the 84 grams of sugar kicked in and the last ten miles disappeared in 2 hours and 38 minutes. my ankle feels great.